Saturday, 19 May 2018

I am Fine

After yesterday, I just want to curl up and sleep like Paddy and Rosy were doing this morning when I had to get up and face the day. I left Matthew with his friends, it is where he feels most comfortable, the shock to me was when he walked out of his room after getting changed after bringing him down from Pretoria to Benoni was that I have an Emo Kid on my hands. He was dressed with a black bennie on his head, long hair hanging down over his eyes, black jeans, and a black long jacket. The saving grace was that he had a red t-shirt on. Oh thank God, a little hope with the splash of colour.

I had to leave him there with his friends, although my inner self was screaming no. But even though he answers all questions of how he is with a non committal "I am fine", I know that he is not but his heart is in the hands of God.

This morning, there was lots of excitement in the air as it was the day of the Royal Wedding. Oh so what was my response as I had to go do some work. To me standing still I start sinking. I have to keep moving, 1 foot in front of the other even though I feel like these 2 cats, wanting to just curl up into myself as I am emotionally exhausted.

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